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This is a taste of what is to come. For those who have already read this on myspace, I apologize.
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I was feeling melo-happy, when I walked into work this morning, but now I feel glum like a book soaked with cola: formerly crisp and white, now curling and tattooed with brown tones. The early morning run followed by eggs and coffee set me up for a remarkable Thursday. Below my desk at work the computer tower fan exhales continuously, only noticeable when the copier settles down. Click-click goes my mouse as I delete spam from my inbox. I see that there awaits a response to a blog post and I race to open myspace. My heart sinks… Yesterday, after reading the blog of an old friend, I wrote a lengthy response hoping to re-route the course of the asinine bullshit flung by degenerate responders. Her page was strewn with fine examples of uncritical pseudo-reading and to my sensibility, most distasteful. May I consider flattering a response formulated thusly: ‘thanks for posting, I cast my gaze on your writing but it wasn’t worth my consideration’? So, I took her invitation to: “Feel free to respond. Agree or strongly disagree! I would LOVE to hear about it either way. I need a good rebuttal” It turns out she didn’t want a rebuttal. Any rebuttal. Especially not a good one (and I am arrogant enough to suppose that after a few drafts, mine was good).
BOOM! Deleted!
I’m left to dress the grave of my blog response. How could this happen? The world is once again a baffling place. I suppose no one wants to be told he or she is wrong. It’s possible even those who explicitly invite counter-argument secretly hope no one will disagree. Why does this happen? Have we failed to progress past tribal mentality where dissenting opinions are silenced for the survival of the tribe? Or have we really bought into the democratic ideal: the one that should dominate is whichever is most popular? Or is the illusion of perfect knowledge so seductive that we are unable to hold an opinion tentatively? Must we parade around every loosely held opinion as big-T Truth?
I, for one, am proud to disagree with you, all of you. Yay for you who escaped the pitfalls that I did not. I know in one sense this attempt to sharpen iron on iron is a pastime as fruitless as mowing Astroturf, but another personality inside hopes we will truly benefit from this exercise.
“When He hath tried me, I shall come forth as gold.” Job 23:10
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